Recently people’ve liking all sorts of things on facebook like “dear England, we have irn bru. Fuck you” or “dear Scotland, we have London. Fuck yer iron brew”. And I love it.
I think everyone should have national pride. You should be able to admit the flaws of your country, unlike most Americans who seem to have the impression that their country is perfect in every way. But you should still think that the country you come from, however shite, is the best country. I’ve always felt this way and I’m not sure why. I’ve never really been brought up in a particularly Scottish way, and I think it’s more to do with me having odd loyalty issues. I love Dundee. It’s my favourite city I’ve ever been to. I’ve been to bigger, busier cities, but they don’t impress me, Dundee’s still the best. I used to be very protective of KFC when I worked there, but now I’ve left I couldn’t care less. I’m not sure exactly why, but I feel that it’s fine for me to slag things I’m part of, but not for someone else to. I’m proud of where I come from, cause I genuinely believe that even though it has many faults, Scotland is the greatest country in the world.
England however is a different matter, it’s Scotland’s nearest competition. And because of that we’ve always have rivalry. And I think the level it’s reached now is healthy. We don’t have wars, or massive fights. We just slag each other off and act like we hate each other, when if we actually visit the other country it’s not that bad. Not that I’d ever tell those wankers that. But it’s fun, and it’s good to have a bit of national rivalry alive, keep our pride alive.
Which brings me to the point. I say I hate the English who are slagging off Scotland. But I don’t really. In fact, I respect them for having the same commitment to their country as I do to mine. What I hate are the fuckers who say stuff like:
1)Irn Bru is sold in England too, so England and Scotland both have access to it,
2)English people don't speak in posh accents, in fact lots of them barely pass as literate,
3)Coffee is the most popular hot beverage in England, not tea
4)No matter where an inventor comes from, it's their idea, not their country's
5)Every country has its flaws, no country is perfect
6)While we've been arguing about whether Scotland or England is better, we should have been abusing FranceSeriously? Are you so afraid of a little fight? Oh, lets all be friends in the UK. Fuck off. The English have tried to invade Scotland many times, and the UK government is always screwing over the Scottish people because the main members of it are posh English folk who couldn’t care less about us (example: poll tax). Oh and don’t even get me started on the sort of coverage of sporting events, like when on the fucking news they told me to get behind my national England squad. Erm, forget about anyone? So I feel a little disappointed when people can’t get themselves excited to fly the Saltire and sing Flower of Scotland. Talking of which, both national athems of Scotland and England have verses about us fighting each other. If we start to accept the English then soon we’ll be one big worldwide country, where there are no longer separate traditions and everywhere is all exactly the same. So just to finish off, let me answer the comment above with my answers that explain how great my country is:
1)Irn Bru is sold in England too, so England and Scotland both have access to it,
2)English people don't speak in posh accents, in fact lots of them barely pass as literate,
3)Coffee is the most popular hot beverage in England, not tea
4)No matter where an inventor comes from, it's their idea, not their country's
5)Every country has its flaws, no country is perfect
6)While we've been arguing about whether Scotland or England is better, we should have been abusing the French.
So in conclusion: I love Scotland. It’s the best country. If you disagree and love England, then you’re an idiot. But at least you have an opinion instead of being an apathetic dickhead who thinks they’re above all this. We all have our traditions. I just like Irn Bru, Haggis, shortbread and the PROPER Auld Lang Syne.
Yeah, I’m not over that. Fuck Mariah Carey.
I think everyone should have national pride. You should be able to admit the flaws of your country, unlike most Americans who seem to have the impression that their country is perfect in every way. But you should still think that the country you come from, however shite, is the best country. I’ve always felt this way and I’m not sure why. I’ve never really been brought up in a particularly Scottish way, and I think it’s more to do with me having odd loyalty issues. I love Dundee. It’s my favourite city I’ve ever been to. I’ve been to bigger, busier cities, but they don’t impress me, Dundee’s still the best. I used to be very protective of KFC when I worked there, but now I’ve left I couldn’t care less. I’m not sure exactly why, but I feel that it’s fine for me to slag things I’m part of, but not for someone else to. I’m proud of where I come from, cause I genuinely believe that even though it has many faults, Scotland is the greatest country in the world.
England however is a different matter, it’s Scotland’s nearest competition. And because of that we’ve always have rivalry. And I think the level it’s reached now is healthy. We don’t have wars, or massive fights. We just slag each other off and act like we hate each other, when if we actually visit the other country it’s not that bad. Not that I’d ever tell those wankers that. But it’s fun, and it’s good to have a bit of national rivalry alive, keep our pride alive.
Which brings me to the point. I say I hate the English who are slagging off Scotland. But I don’t really. In fact, I respect them for having the same commitment to their country as I do to mine. What I hate are the fuckers who say stuff like:
1)Irn Bru is sold in England too, so England and Scotland both have access to it,
2)English people don't speak in posh accents, in fact lots of them barely pass as literate,
3)Coffee is the most popular hot beverage in England, not tea
4)No matter where an inventor comes from, it's their idea, not their country's
5)Every country has its flaws, no country is perfect
6)While we've been arguing about whether Scotland or England is better, we should have been abusing FranceSeriously? Are you so afraid of a little fight? Oh, lets all be friends in the UK. Fuck off. The English have tried to invade Scotland many times, and the UK government is always screwing over the Scottish people because the main members of it are posh English folk who couldn’t care less about us (example: poll tax). Oh and don’t even get me started on the sort of coverage of sporting events, like when on the fucking news they told me to get behind my national England squad. Erm, forget about anyone? So I feel a little disappointed when people can’t get themselves excited to fly the Saltire and sing Flower of Scotland. Talking of which, both national athems of Scotland and England have verses about us fighting each other. If we start to accept the English then soon we’ll be one big worldwide country, where there are no longer separate traditions and everywhere is all exactly the same. So just to finish off, let me answer the comment above with my answers that explain how great my country is:
1)Irn Bru is sold in England too, so England and Scotland both have access to it,
2)English people don't speak in posh accents, in fact lots of them barely pass as literate,
3)Coffee is the most popular hot beverage in England, not tea
4)No matter where an inventor comes from, it's their idea, not their country's
5)Every country has its flaws, no country is perfect
6)While we've been arguing about whether Scotland or England is better, we should have been abusing the French.
So in conclusion: I love Scotland. It’s the best country. If you disagree and love England, then you’re an idiot. But at least you have an opinion instead of being an apathetic dickhead who thinks they’re above all this. We all have our traditions. I just like Irn Bru, Haggis, shortbread and the PROPER Auld Lang Syne.
By the way, I have no explaination for why some of the text is black.
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