So I go into the cinema, get a seat, chat to my friends for a wee bit then the lights start to dim. Then two idiots come on the screen and start making bad jokes and showing clips of Red Bull covered vehicles doing stunts. So this is an advert right? Well it is. But with a twist. This advert lasts for about 10, 15 minutes. Excuse me what? That’s like when Disney show little short films before the main feature. Except they’re good. This is just a couple of “cool” ex-snowboarders making bad puns and showing us clips of unimpressive stunts. And it’s clearly all as an advert for Red Bull, which would’ve been better if they’d mentioned Red Bull more than about once, and you know what, would’ve been better if they’d just had a funny 30 second ad. Making me sit this long has actively put me off buying Red Bull. If I ever had any desire to buy it it’s gone now that they’re the guys who made me sit for 15 minutes bored stiff in the cinema. Then at the end of this mammoth advert the guys say “Now here’s the film!” and I could almost have forgiven them if it had been the film.
But no. It was more adverts. Lots and lots of adverts. And these adverts took 20 minutes. So that’s 35 minutes of adverts in total so far. And the kicker is that one of the second lot of adverts was another one for Red Bull. Have we not had enough from them already? Then there was two trailers. Which bring me to my main point. We all hate adverts in the cinema. We go to see a film not adverts and they’re just kind of forced onto us, but there’s nothing we can do because the funding from the adverts is one of the things that keeps the cinemas open. But if you’re going to see a film can the adverts at least be for other films? I don’t mind sitting through trailers because maybe I’ll see a film I didn’t know about and it’ll make me want to go and see it. But I don’t want to see the exact same adverts as I see on TV. If I wanted to see a 3 minute long 14 year old’s emo poem advertising an energy drink, then I’d see it on the TV. That’s where adverts like this belong. They don’t belong in the cinema. There are three reasons to go to the cinema and one of them is to get out of your house. And if you’re just watching bigger versions of the adverts on your TV then you might as well have stayed at home.