Monday, 21 March 2011

Robocop 2's Stupid. Very Stupid.

Oh Rob. You reeled me in with your first film, and then gave me Robocop 2. It’s good, I know, but it’s like taking me to an expensive restaurant, showing me all the fancy food then giving me an angus burger from BK. It’s still good, but it’s a disappointment. And it’s stupid.
But, this isn’t about my feelings for Rob 2. No, it’s the stupidity you’ve come for! And there’s plenty to go around.  The plot is, evil businesswoman wants to replace Rob, with a new model. Rob gets almost killed and she’s given him to fix. Instead of finishing him off which would’ve been the smart thing to do, she gives him hundreds of commands that drive him insane. But 5 minutes of Rob acting like an idiot later, he electrocutes himself, and he’s back to the way he was. It was difficult, and her  stupid plan fails, leaving no trace, except the impression it was only there to pad a film that was too short.
And the woman’s bigger stupid mistake: Robocop 2. This is him:

Fuckin A. He looks bad-ass. Buuuuuuuut. At the start of the film we see previous Rob 2’s have failed cause they go mental. Rob only worked because of his sense of duty and will to survive. So who ends up in Rob 2? Another policeman? A soldier maybe, that’d be interesting, maybe they’d be too violent and that would... Oh no, that isn’t what happened. They got a drug addict. I have no idea why. There’s some bullshit about him being good for the job cause he really wants to live. But that’s shit. Oh, and remember those commands she gave Rob? Well none to Rob 2. He can kill anyone he wants, he doesn’t have any programming to stop him just doing whatever he wants. They could do that, they did it to Rob... but it would make too much sense here so no. Instead, to keep him under their control they supply him with drugs. And he knows they have them, and he’s the most powerful machine they have, they have no defensive from him... You see where I’m going here? The woman is a complete idiot. And I had no sympathy for her when Rob 2 turned on her, I knew it was coming a mile away.

Oh, and stupidest part of the whole thing? Rob 2 didnt need the whole head of the druggie. It just needed his brain, spinal cord and eyes. And it looks like this:

ohhhhhhhhh dear.

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